I’m bringing this back to talk about the now-legendary interaction Reimu had with Meira in Story of Eastern Wonderland, which, to be perfectly honest, has kind of a messy translation. A lot of the nuance in it was erased – it’s too literal in some places, it takes too many assumed liberties in others, and there are even some outright mistakes that change the meaning of what’s been said in some pretty significant ways
(translator assumed みたい instead of the correct 見たい at one point).
Follow me below the fold. If you’re a fan of Touhou shipping, would you believe me if I told you this moment could get even more gay than before?
First line, we already run into problems.
わたしは明羅。博麗は私がもらう ぞ。
I am Meira. I have come to take the Hakurei.
I will note right away that Meira is definitely a girl’s name, and it’s a fairly common one at that, and she introduces herself with that name, so I don’t buy the idea that Reimu mistook her for a man. That’s a bit like her going “I am Emily” and you going “Oh yeah that’s a man”.
She talks like a stereotypical villain, so her sentences are rough, bombastic, and long-winded. Her self-pronoun is the common “Watashi”, which is a ubiquitous gender-neutral “me” pronoun. Nearly all the Touhou girls use this. She does use the masculine “zo” particle for emphasis, but Villains do this a lot, as “zo” is often treated like a more classy version of “ze”, so a lot of girls use it too. Many Touhou girls have used “zo” at some point, Reimu included, though you would never hear proper ladies like Sakuya and Yukari using it. Futo uses it near-constantly, as does Okina (another bombastic villain).
More to the point though, the original translation doesn’t even sound like a proper English sentence, and there are some liberties taken. There is no “the” Hakurei in this sentence (technically, there probably wouldn’t be one even if it was intentional, but ambiguity is important in Japanese), and the word for “take” is more in the vein of “receive”, and could also mean “get someone to do something for you”. It’s ambiguous. This translation is not. Here’s how I would have translated it:
I have come to make Hakurei mine.
or, since there’s no “I’ve come” in the sentence either,
I will make Hakurei mine.
We can do better than that, though.
I have come to take Hakurei out.
Now you understand Reimu’s reaction. But the translation of her reaction is not quite there.
こらこら、いきなり何いってんのよ。
Whoa, whoa, slow down there!
No. What she actually says is THE most cliche love-confession-reaction line in Japanese media:
Whoa whoa, what are you saying all of a sudden!?
I read a lot of minor-league doujins. I have seen this line. just. so many times.
Reimu continues:
まあいいけど。
Well, I guess I don’t mind, but…
That translation makes it sound like Reimu is unsure or uneasy. The opposite is true – she’s actually clarifying that despite her previous reaction, she’s 100% okay with this. There is no “I guess”, it’s literally just “Well, it’s fine, however.” Her portrait changes to a blushing smile as she says it. Better translation:
Well, not that I mind, though!
Uh-oh. Eyes open. Big sweatdrop. Meira seems to realize she’s been misunderstood. She regains composure and clarifies herself:
？
と、とにかく、私が勝ったら博麗
の力は、私の物だからな！
?
A-Anyway, if I win, then the power
of the Hakurei will be mine!
‘the Hakurei’ again. Also, needs more ham.
?
Uh–in any event, should I gain victory,
the power of Hakurei will henceforth belong to me!
Reimu is smitten. Blushing, smiling, and “ara~”. Seems she thinks villains are sexy. Huh. Given what she’s done in every game since then, that does make sense for her, doesn’t it?
あら・・・
私なら別に戦わなくてもいいわよ
Oh, my…
There’s no need to fight with me, you know!
Accurate enough, although some nuance is missing. I’d have said it:
Oh, my…
If it’s me you want, we don’t exactly need to fight, you know.
Reimu winks. Meira’s whole portrait box turns pale.
!?
Reimu head-tilt.
あら？ どしたの。
My, what’s the matter?
Bit literal, but eh, close enough.
欲しいのは、あんたじゃない！！
あんたの力だ！！ばかもん！！
It isn’t you I want!!
I want your power, you fool!!
MORE HAM!! DRAMATIC PAUSES! ALL CAPS!!
What I desire… IS NOT YOU!!
IT IS YOUR POWER!! YOU FOOL!!
ZUN missed an opportunity for this to be misunderstood as yet another freudian slip. Power is “Chikara”. Her second sentence is “Chikara da!!” Karada means “body”, so it sounds like she’s saying “your body”. Could have gotten a “Whoa! Aren’t we moving a bit too fast?” “AAAAARGH!” Instead, we get a boring:
私のちから？ なにそれ。
My power? What do you mean?
Actually, Reimu’s even dumber than that. More accurately:
My ‘power’? What’s that.
There are a number of different ways to interpret this. Meira said it with Kanji, but Reimu spelled it out with Hiragana. Maybe Reimu doesn’t know the word yet, maybe Reimu just has no idea she’s different from a normal person in that she has superpowers (she still kinda does this, assumes everyone is just like her). Maybe this was even Reimu’s very first instance of a long pattern she has of not quite hearing what people said and asking them to repeat themselves… but I’ll talk about that another time. Is it all of the above? Take your pick.
Meira interjects one last time:
それに私は、女だ！！
気持ち悪い！！
And besides, I’m a woman!! That’s gross!!
Accurate enough, but MORE HAM!!!
Moreover, I am a woman!!
Revolting!!
Reimu then makes it perfectly clear that she doesn’t see a problem here.
じゃ☆私が勝ったら・・ なら
いいでしょ、
そっちも条件ある見たいだし・・
So! If I win, then…
…that’ll be fine,
since it seems you have your own conditions…
This one’s got a pretty significant mistake in it.
So☆ If I win… if that’s the case
I’m fine with that,
were there any conditions you wanted to add..?
Meira says “I’m a woman”, and Reimu responds by going “Yeah, not seeing a problem here” and makes “Meira carries me off and makes me hers” to be her own victory condition.
The last line changed substantially. 見たい is used here instead of みたい, but the original translator acted like it was the latter. It’s an important distinction, because even though both are “mitai”, 見たい means “want to see”, and みたい means “seems like”. “Seems like you have your own conditions” would be correct for みたい but that’s not what we have. It could have been a typo on ZUN’s part, but we translate what we see, not what we want to see, and I believe there is no typo here. Reimu spends the entire rest of their interactions wondering if Meira wanted anything, while Meira spends the rest of it wondering how Reimu missed the meaning of everything she said before.
Meira shouts:
人の話聞いてるのか！！
Are you even listening to me!?
More like,
Do you hear people when they talk to you!!?
I’ll skip to the end because the rest in between is nothing but irrelevant, obscure 80s manga jokes that I have no frame of reference for, and which lose all meaning in translation. Reimu does confirm that she heard Meira, though, and she starts the fighting with:
いいかって聞いてるだろが。
I was asking if you accept, stupid.
Rude. Translators always have a bad habit of playing up Reimu’s rudeness, and it bothers me. She’s blunt, not intentionally rude. More like,
I’m just asking if you’re fine with everything, okay?
Meira’s last line is pretty funny given the context, but the original translation doesn’t convey what’s actually going on…
うう、まけたくない～
Ugh, I don’t want to lose…
…because Meira completely breaks character in this last moment.
Uu, I don’t wanna lose~
She’s now so distressed over what’s at stake that she’s stopped talking like a villain and started whimpering like a little girl herself. She’s no longer concerned with what she might win, she’s afraid of what might happen if she loses.
So, basically… (points to the meme at the top)
